Audio

[timesbureaucrat]

[Private to Security Personnel]

My apologies if I've been excessively underfoot for some of you [Charon. Kay. Boone, to some extent.] during the investigation into the explosions. As I have been recently reminded, it is not my place to pry into security matters. I shall henceforth be leaving it to the professionals. And if you find any bomb scraps that need analyzing, I am at your service. [He can't entirely let it go, but at least he's gone from wanting to personally investigate and occasionally tossing around orders to simply offering to assist in his technician capacity.]

[Private to Kay]

Are you available for that talk you mentioned earlier?

Comments

[most_feared]

[He doesn't even respond to that. Both are accurate, really. Serleena murdered Laurana, and while he deprived himself of the memory he always felt the hate and the bitterness. Alpha- well, Alpha might be the only individual that can truly make him nigh on irrational with the level of hate he experiences when he sees him]

Yeah, that's pretty illegal. [He raises a brow.]

And what have you figured out? [He asks as if he hasn't been watching, himself.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[Narvin notices that non-answer and suspects that there's a story there. He also suspects that Kay is not going to tell it to him.

He also notices the eyebrow raise and clears his throat before he tries to explain himself.]

Well, I was an intelligence operative. There, I had legal jurisdiction to hack into other people's computers. But don't worry, I have the utmost respect for the law, seeing as on Gallifrey it was my job to enforce it.

[He shuffles his observations on the others into order.]

Wander is a peculiar alien, not one I've heard of before, but he seem unambitious and lacking in malice. Any trouble he caused would likely be accidental chaos of poking his nose in the wrong place at the wrong time, fiddling with things he shouldn't.

The elves are...interesting. They remind me of my own people somewhat. Our shared longevity gives us certain shared perspectives, I think.

Miss Persson strikes me as someone who could cause a lot of trouble. She has the air of a mischief maker about her, an agitator. The same with Mr. Bellic. [The two people he gets along least with. It's a combination of seeing the people he's quarreled with in a more negative light, and being more likely to butt heads with anti-authoritarian personalities.]

Boone reminds me of a Chancellery Guard. Solid, probably a good man in a fight, reliable, but a very linear and uncomplicated thinker. [And fun to poke, just as Narvin pokes at Chancellery Guards.]

I don't trust Braska. [He says bluntly. Braska has done nothing suspicious and has been unfailingly polite. Narvin doesn't know what to make of that niceness. Also...] He's a priest. [He adds, as if that only explains it.]

Mr. Smiley and Dr. Visscher are both wholly unremarkable as far as I can tell. Ordinary humans going about their job. Mr. Wooster is only remarkable in his inanity.

Miss Westmarch asks too many questions. [Pot. Kettle.]

As for the rest, I haven't observed them enough to make judgments yet.

[most_feared]

[Kay snorts and smiles. That's a little funny to him. Una strikes him as a fun loving idealist. Her version of no good would be more articulate than blowing up fences randomly. Bellic is a little suspicious, but mostly seems like the sort that doesn't want anything to do with any political movement- like oil and water. He fully well knows what Smiley is and Braska has been nothing but fair and gentle. Overly eager, but fair and gentle.]

[The elves don't actually remind him of Narvin so much, considering Narvin's aversion to nature. But he supposes Lindir's aversion to adventurous technology is close enough. ]

I guess you got it all figured out, huh? Well, I was just wonderin'.

[He settles back and stirs his coffee.] So you want me to look for someone trained and discrete that can give you some help with that? I know more about criminal psychology, not so much putting someone back together.

[timesbureaucrat]

[Narvin's eyes narrow, suspecting that Kay's mocking him somehow.]

I'm not a profiler. And with all of my usual methods unavailable to me, this is what I have.

[Narvin takes a sip of his tea, finally. He decides it's not bad, even if the milk and sugar are natural. He can hardly tell the difference.]

I don't want anyone else to know. Even one person knowing is one person too many but I felt I had no choice. I needed you to understand that my interest in this case wasn't out of criminal malice. As it is, I feel that you know too much about me while I still know very little about you, which is a state of affairs that makes me uneasy to say the least.

[most_feared]

I didn't think it was.

Not much to know about me. I'm not necessarily a person. I am a job. It's what I do. Anything I enjoy or own is circumstantial and only as allotted by my organization. My identity as a human being has been erased.

That said, because I technically don't own anything, my possessions throug me are owned by my organization, I'm not particularly ambitious. So I'm not gonna want to keep you down or use anything I've heard against you in some way. [He shrugs. Why would it be worth the trouble.]

But if you change your mind I'll have a looksee around and keep your name out of it until I come across someone you like.

[timesbureaucrat]

Even if you own no possessions, you must still possess thoughts, fears, hopes, vexations, desires. I've revealed to you a point of weakness, of insecurity, a moment in my history that I'm not proud of. Would it be impossible for you to reveal something personal in return? Not anything compromising, of course, just something of you?

[At this point, he'd settle for something minor and trivial.]

[most_feared]

I like apple pie because sitting down and eating a pie helps keep me from overthinking something.

[That's something anyway.]

I thought for the most part you came here to figure out your own head so you wouldn't have those vexations? [Not to find out anything about him.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[Victory! Glorious victory! Getting that tiny nugget of information, small as it is, feels like a tremendous accomplishment after all the time and effort it took to get it.]

You're not wrong. But I see no reason not to multitask.

[most_feared]

Why are you trying to multitask? [For all his paranoia, he doesn't think Narvin would want to compromise his efforts to be a responsible protection officer. Nor can he figure out why talking to him would be interesting.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[He gives an idle shrug.] Curiosity.

You're an interesting human.

[And for a temperament like Narvin's, there's nothing like presenting a granite block keeping in all information to make Narvin strongly feel that he needs to know everything that's being kept from him.]

[most_feared]

Oh.

[He says it mildly. ]

A lot of aliens are actually scared shitless of me. [He says as he stirs his coffee.]

[timesbureaucrat]

You see, I find that interesting.

[The ruthless exercise of power--whether political or firepower--and the ability to strike fear into one's enemies are things that have always drawn Narvin's attention, although he's only just recently started to be self aware of that fact.]

Do they have good reason to be?

[most_feared]

Only if they try to fuck with my planet and it's citizens. That includes the immigrated ones that are just minding their own business.

I guess they get all worked up over nothing.

[timesbureaucrat]

If the fear thus inspired gives some hostile aliens pause and keeps them from carrying out an attack, then it's all for the best that you have that reputation.

[A pause.]

I'm not frightened. [Cautious, yes. Fascinated, definitely. But not frightened.]

[most_feared]

It's not a reputation I care for. [He says earnestly.] There are a dozen agents that I think are as good as I am but just don't have my history, but because I have a reputation I invite a lot of people to come after me to show how big and bad they are because they think they can whoop my ass, or they can use me to fuck with a timeline since a lot of important events for my organization are related to my continuity.

If it was me, no one would ever notice me. I do my best to keep it that way with people, but there are situations where there's just no such luck. [He sounds very unhappy about this. He likes being good at his job, not asking for trouble.]

[timesbureaucrat]

So it's a...[He searches for the English idiom.]...double edged sword. Some aliens respect you for it, but for others it makes you a desirable target.

Have hostiles attacked your timeline a lot? [As far as Narvin is concerned, that kind of attack is more devastating than a blaster. A blaster will just kill you, but a temporal assault can wipe out millions in the collateral damage.]

[most_feared]

Fear isn't respect. If that were the case, you would respect terrorists.

[His brows climb up a little.] No, it's not respect. Totally different thing.

[timesbureaucrat]

[That gives Narvin pause. He'd never considered it in those terms.]

Are you respected as well as feared?

[most_feared]

Enough to get my work done and that's what matters.

[He doesn't sound all that flattered by the attention. It's just a thing that exists.]

[timesbureaucrat]

Where I was before I came here--it's a long story, alternate universes--I wasn't exactly respected there, but I was feared. And that did the job well enough.

[It was a novelty. Half the Capitol might have hated him, thanks to the reputation his alternate self had cultivated before Narvin stepped into his shoes, but when he gave an order they followed it.]

I don't crave power or attention or glory, but I admit, I want to be respected. It's...never really worked out for me, however. It seems to be worse, not better, the higher in rank one gets. Everyone is that much more keen to tear you down. I'd hoped I'd be happier as a technician, with no eyes upon me, no judgement. But it's been a long time since I was...normal. Just a civilian leading a civilian life. It's surprisingly difficult to adjust.

[most_feared]

No. No when you're feared, people keep things from you. Lie to you. Avoid you, make it difficult to be found. If they respect you, they give you whatever you need, they trust in your abilities rather than just let you do it because you might hurt them otherwise even if you're incompetent.

[He rolls his eyes.] I think I just pinpointed the problem with most workplace managers I've run into out in the civilian sector.

[timesbureaucrat]

Well.

[His eyebrows rise and fall in a quick, resigned facial shrug.]

That's disheartsening.

Perhaps it's better for everyone that I am just a technician. There, at least if I'm not respected, if information is willfully kept from me, no one dies as a result.

[most_feared]

Yeah.

Sorta sad how we're the backwards ones.

But I met way too many species that think the same thing. [He sounds sincerely disappointed by that himself.]

[timesbureaucrat]

[Narvin ponders that for a moment.]

Have you ever been in a position where you start to wonder if it's worth it? If everything you sacrificed and everything you risk to do the job you do is worth it?

[most_feared]

Oh. No. No I work for good people. It's worth it. Sure, sometimes I wonder what mighta been but... for the most part? [He rubs the back of his neck thoughtfully. Hm. Even with Alpha?]

Yeah. Yeah, it's been worth it.